I’m trying to keep an open mind here, but dating is turning into a bit of a circus. I’m talking about Brian, the 23-year-old in NYC who plans to go on 30 dates in 30 days, leaving matchmaking and moves to Twitter, Facebook, and YouTube. It feels less like finding love and more like producing a show for an audience. Every date becomes part of the entertainment. And every decision can be watched, discussed, and judged by strangers online.

He recently broke up from a long-term relationship, and this may be a way to get dates, or at least a lot of attention. The whole thing seems like a movie or TV show waiting to happen. It’s more of a smart business move than a real play for finding love. Although he needs to lose the capris. I know NYC is hot, but that isn’t going to impress the girls. Maybe the publicity will help him meet someone interesting. Or maybe it will simply make him famous for dating thirty women.

Many people look for one person and go on an infinite number of dates until that special someone appears. The other dates become white noise, irrelevant, just numbers. I went into speed dating hoping to sift through the masses, but I didn’t really connect with people enough to discover what I wanted. I knew what I wanted, or thought I did, so it was always on to the next. In a sense, I felt it was a process of elimination. That approach can make every person feel temporary before you even meet

Dating isn’t a numbers game. Each person we interact with affects our lives and perception. We can choose to have a good time, ignore someone, or engage with them. Every date offers a chance to learn something about ourselves, but most of us have tunnel vision and rush toward the next one. Brian may break old patterns, or he may miss someone great while listening to everyone but himself. At 23, he has plenty of time. Maybe he should carry on and get the film rights sold.